Do I Need a Doula?

Oct 19

You’re pregnant. Maybe you planned months and years for this pregnancy and child, or maybe this pregnancy was a surprise. You’re going to your doctor’s appointments and following the recommendations, but maybe you feel like every visit is rushed and there’s no time for your questions, or maybe you aren’t even sure what questions to ask. Everyone has an opinion on your pregnancy and your birth—your mom, your siblings, your in-laws, your friends, random strangers at the grocery store. You feel like there is an expected way for you to give birth and depending on the people in your life and the way you were raised, that “correct” way could be very different from what you’re actually hoping for. Or maybe you’ve never thought to ask questions about how you want to give birth. You’ve heard of birth plans, but you’ve also maybe heard that medical providers hate birth plans? You know someone with a 6-page birth plan and someone else who told you their birth plan is “both of us leave alive and healthy” and that they don’t care what happens to get to that point. Maybe you’re reading every book you can get your hands on. Maybe you’ve read nothing.

Regardless, you’re probably feeling some level of overwhelmed. Perhaps you’re looking for support getting your questions answered. Or you need more check-ins outside of your medical appointments. Maybe you need help advocating for yourself during the birth. Or maybe you need support in a hundred different ways. The reality is doula work is an incredibly customizable way to get more support. For the most part, doula support can be broken into four categories: physical support, emotional support, educational support, and advocacy support.

Physical Support

Most commonly, physical support is offered in person during your labor. This includes offering massage or counter pressure, helping you move around during your labor (including helping you change positions if you choose an epidural), supporting you using tools such as birth and peanut balls, squat bars, or the shower. Physical support is intended to help you physically cope with the sensations of labor as well as to help your labor progress smoothly. If you have a partner that will be attending the birth, this also often includes the doula teaching your birth partner how to provide physical support.

Emotional Support

This is often the most frequently thought of support that doulas offer. I find that it is also the type of support that varies the most in style between doulas! Some doulas offer affirmations while others may offer religious emotional support. Emotional support includes holding your hand, coaching you through difficult moments, validating your experience, and so many other things. Sometimes, this role includes being the bouncer when people try to join the birthday party uninvited. There is a strong connection between coping with labor and your emotional state, and a doula is there to help you through the emotionally challenging moments of your pregnancy and birth. Yes, this includes being the person you can text in your 38th week of pregnancy when you’re exhausted and think you cannot deal with your increasing Braxton hicks any longer or during your 9th week of pregnancy when you are overwhelmed dealing with your nausea and vomiting before you’ve even shared that you’re pregnant.

Educational Support

Personally, I think the educational support doulas can provide is incredibly underrated. Your medical providers are very knowledgeable about medicine, but those appointments are short, and they rarely answer questions like:

Is there anything I can do during pregnancy to make my labor shorter or easier?
How does labor normally progress?
How do I know if I’m in labor?
Can I do anything about this nausea? Or my joint pain?
Who do I talk to about breastfeeding or formula? And when can I introduce a bottle?
I’m so uncomfortable and cannot fall asleep, can I do anything about that?
Is this my mucus plug?

This is where having a doula can be SO helpful. For most doulas, you can truly text them anytime during your pregnancy to get an answer to a quick question or help with referrals to other providers like pelvic floor therapists, IBCLCs, childbirth education classes, acupuncturists, etc.

Advocacy Support

This last one is not a type of support that all doulas offer, but I think it is often the most important type of support that a doula can offer. Here’s how it looks for me: I start by building a relationship with my clients and learning about what is important to them. Then, I ensure they get the educational information and resources they need to make their own decisions during pregnancy, birth, and postpartum. I teach patient self-advocacy skills to all of my clients so that they know how to advocate for what they’re hoping for and they feel confident doing so. We practice those advocacy skills by role-playing situations. During your labor, when things inevitably change from your plan, I make sure that you know what questions to ask to find out how one decision may affect other decisions about your labor. And I help you to advocate for yourself during your labor and birth.

So…do you need a doula? Only you can answer that, but I can share with you that I do this work because I truly believe in this work. I do this work because there are measurable benefits in birth outcomes for people who hire doulas. Whether it is your first birth or your fifth, a doula offers a unique degree of individualized, continuous support from as early as pre-pregnancy all the way through postpartum.

Interested in working with a doula who offers all four tiers of support with a particular emphasis on education and advocacy? Learn about my birth package!